Sound familiar?

During the last decade, our relationship with technology has taken on a whole new tint. A few, short years ago, we didn’t sleep with our cell phones, text during dinner or know the precise angle in order to achieve the perfect selfie. But now, and for just about everyone the technological advancements that once made our lives easier and helped us connect to our fellow humans are now threatening to swallow our days in a barrage of emails, apps, games and texts. Where is our technology use taking us socially and culturally? Should we adopt a more moderate relationship with our devices? And are there any benefits to unplugging, disconnecting and ignoring the “ding” of that email you just got?

“If it’s a really interesting lecture and I get the feeling that it’s important, I don’t look at my phone”, explains Tim Gerth (Department of Electrical Engineering) about his in-class technology use, continuing “But if it’s a boring lecture, then, yeah, I might get on my phone. If I’m expecting an important email, then I always take the time to read it.”

Gerth is a good example of the Millennial generation, also known as Generation Y. He and his peers were born between the early 1980s until about 2000. They were the first to come of age with cable TV, the Internet and cell phones so technology is basically woven into their DNA. In fact, when asked what makes their generation unique, Millennials ranked ‘Technology Use’ first (24%), followed by ‘Music/Pop Culture’ (11%) and ‘Liberal/Tolerant’ (7%). In contrast, Baby Boomers (born immediately after WWII) ranked ‘Work Ethic’ as the most defining characteristic of their generation.

So, the Millennials are tech-savvy, hyper-connected and the masters of multi-tasking. They can respond to emails, monitor a Twitter feed and follow a lecture (at least the good bits) and not miss a beat, right? Not exactly. New research reveals that even these digital natives are starting to feel the strain of their ‘always on’ lifestyle, especially after they enter the work world.

According to a 2013 study by Cornerstone OnDemand, a global leader of cloud-based talent management software solutions, the Millennials are struggling to find a tech balance in their daily lives. The company’s vice president, Jason Corsello, says: “Gen Y workers, whom we have largely pigeonholed as having an insatiable appetite for technology, are expressing both a desire for more human, face-to-face interaction and frustration with information and technology overload”.

Why don’t we just walk away?

So if it’s all starting to be too much for us, why don’t we just walk away? What is it about checking email, Facebook, and all the rest that is so incredibly attractive?

Sherry Turkle is a psychologist and world-renowned researcher of human-technology interaction. At a 2012 TED conference (Technology, Education, Design) she discussed her latest book, Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other, and says: “We’re getting used to a new way of being alone together. People want to be with each other, but also elsewhere - connected to all the different places they want to be. People want to customize their lives. They want to go in and out of all the places they are because the thing that matters most to them is control over where they put their attention.”

Mary Bastawrous (Department of Mechanical Engineering) moved to Eindhoven from Egypt last September. She’s trying to focus on her work as a PhD candidate and build a social life here. Her emerging technology use (she got her first smartphone when she arrived in NL) mirrors Turkle’s findings. Mary explains: “I’m thinking of using more messages to talk to friends. If you make a call, you need the time and the mood to do that. But maybe you had a long day and you don’t feel like having a conversation. This way, you’re still staying in touch but it’s more on your own terms.”

Controlling our communication with others is only part of the reason we turn to our devices. For others, social media might even be addictive. A recent Harvard University study showed that disclosing personal information on websites like Facebook and Twitter activates the pleasure centers of the brain, the same areas that light up on an MRI when a person enjoys good food, receiving money or having sex. And similar research reveals the same phenomenon at work when we check email. Like mice in a lab that only receive food after a specific behavior, checking email sometimes offers up particularly delicious nuggets - an email from a long-lost friend, a job offer, or an invitation to a social event. In response, we develop the habit of ‘over-checking’ our email in the hopes that we’ll be richly compensated for our efforts. Harold Bak (Department of Electrical Engineering) jokingly sums up this impulse: “If I notice an email, I will look at it right away. People in the current age, they have their email linked directly to their brains. New email in! Must respond immediately!”

Being alone feels like a problem that needs to be solved

Sherry Turkle further defines our love affair with our devices: “Those phones in our pockets are changing our minds and hearts because they offer us three gratifying fantasies. One, that we can put our attention wherever we want it to be; two, that we will always be heard; and three, that we will be alone. And that third idea is central to changing our psyches. Because the moment that people are alone, even for a few seconds, they become anxious, they panic, they fidget, and they reach for a device. Being alone feels like a problem that needs to be solved. And so people try to solve it by connecting. But here, connection is more like a symptom than a cure. It expresses, but it doesn’t solve, an underlying problem.”

When was the last time you were well and truly bored? You know… that feeling that the hours are yawning heavily before you and you have NO idea how to fill them? No? Can’t remember? You’re not alone. For most of us, it’s a virtually unknown phenomenon. And particularly for the Millennials, who’ve grown up with countless digital diversions within arm’s reach, it’s natural to immediately fill an idle moment (or a boring lecture) by texting, tweeting, changing their Facebook status, or launching a few angry birds.

However, for many psychologists, educators, and researchers, the extinction of boredom is a worrying facet of modern life and they advocate quite the opposite: that boredom is good. Boredom is even useful. Allowing yourself to experience healthy doses of it could be an important key to creating a happier, more meaningful life and a vital component to boosting your creativity. In fact, a recent study by Dr. Sandi Mann and Rebekah Cadman of the University of Central Lancashire found that people who were engaged in passive activities, such as simply staring into space, were more likely to daydream - which ultimately had a direct effect on their creativity levels.

In boredom we can find creativity and ourselves

So, should we all go sit in a room and watch the proverbial paint dry on the wall? Not exactly. “Boredom in and of itself is not so important but the ability to be bored signifies the capacity for reflective thought”, explains Dr. Adam Cox, an American psychologist specializing in youth mental health. He continues: “Young minds are currently being sculpted by electronics to be all peaks and no valleys.”

And it’s in those valleys -those low-key moments of doing little and being alone- where we not only tap hidden founts of creativity but also find ourselves. “I’ve been on my own since I was 16 and I got used to it”, explains Mary Bastawrous (Department of Mechanical Engineering), continuing: “Of course, I like to be around people. But sometimes you need to be alone and settle things with yourself. Clear your mind. I find it very important to have that time with myself. I think that’s why I don’t like to call or text so often.”

Bastawrous instinctively keeps herself from becoming hyper-connected and that could be a good thing for her in the long run. It seems that shelving our devices and disconnecting could be vital to sculpting a healthy self-identity - which is the bedrock for how we interact with others. Sherry Turkle warns that an inability to be alone, separate from our devices and all they offer, could in the end backfire: “Solitude is where you find yourself so that you can reach out to other people and form real attachments. We slip into thinking that always being connected is going to make us feel less alone. But actually it’s the opposite that’s true. If we’re not able to be alone, we’re going to be more lonely.”

“There’s no escaping technology”

For the majority of TU/e students and staff, separating from social media and email is almost impossible for any extended period of time. The demands of work, study and social life dictate daily connection. “If I stepped away from social media for a whole week”, jokes Gerth, “I think I’d have a fight with my girlfriend. And my friends!” Harold Bak agrees: “Everything I’m going to do in the next 40 years will be based on technology. I’m surrounded by it. In my line of work, there’s no escaping from it.”

So, what are we to do? If we’re utterly enveloped in our technology with virtually no escape, how do we strike the right balance between technology use that helps versus technology use that hinders? For some, the key to preventing the information overload of today is by drawing on the philosophy of 2000 years ago.

‘Mindfulness’ is a current buzzword in psychology and self-help circles, but the idea has been around for millennia as a cornerstone of Buddhist philosophy. Today, engaging in the practice of mindfulness generally means ‘bringing one’s complete attention to the present experience on a moment-to-moment basis’. In practical terms, it looks like this: You’re walking across campus, on your way to class. But instead of listening to music and thinking about that paper you have due, you wholly and consciously engage in (and hopefully enjoy) your current activity. You remove your earbuds, notice the trees, breathe in the fresh air, and generally ‘experience’ your walk for just what it is - a five minute pause in the middle of your day.

Indulge in Il dolce far niente

Jerome Wehrens is the owner of B-Mind Eindhoven, a local mindfulness training center, and explains that the busy professionals who seek his help often complain of technology overload. “We have so much information that needs to be processed and our brains just aren’t equipped for that. Think about a typical farmer in the Middle Ages. In his entire life, he was probably only confronted with the same amount of new information that we try to process in a single month. It’s just too much for us.”

Wehrens believes that part of our happiness depends on keeping our tech use at bay, at least for defined periods. “When you check in on social media or check your email, it’s a surrogate happiness. You can create the same emotion, much more strongly, when you become aware of things in the moment. In fact, it releases a hormone in the hypothalamus that provides an actual good feeling. By doing this a hundred times a day, it’s not that you think you’re happier - you actually are.” Wehrens also coaches his clients to take their mindfulness further by teaching them the art of meditation - 20 or 30 minutes a day of meditation and clients lower their stress levels and become more productive.

Learning to be alone, cultivating boredom, mindfulness, meditation - sure, we can arm ourselves with tools that’ll help safeguard our peace of mind during this unknown and ever-developing relationship with our technology. But maybe in the end, the best thing to do is to adopt a life strategy from our fellow Europeans - from time to time shut down, switch off and log out to simply indulge in Il dolce far niente - or the sweetness of doing nothing.